Getting a Divorce

We know from long experience that only collaborative divorce — not old-style adversarial legal representation, and not a single mediator working with or without lawyers in the picture — views divorce as a complex experience requiring advice and counsel from multiple perspectives if it is to be navigated well. Collaborative divorce prepares you to deal with the emotional challenges and changes associated with divorce and provides the resources that can best help you make a healthy transition from married to single.

Collaborative divorce builds in important protections for children, too. It informs you fully about how your children are experiencing the divorce and what they need to weather the big changes in their family structure without harm. It helps protect your future relationship with your spouse by informing both of you fully — together, at the same time — about the financial realities of your marriage and divorce in a way that eliminates pointless arguments about economic issues. It also teaches you and your spouse new ways of problem solving and conflict resolution so that you develop useful skills for addressing your differences more constructively in the future. Further, collaborative divorce

Helps you clarify your individual and shared values and priorities

Helps you and your spouse reach maximum consensus

Includes complete advice about the law without using legal rights as the sole template for negotiation and resolution

Helps you and your spouse resolve serious differences creatively and without destructive conflict

Helps parents improve their ability to coparent after divorce

Builds in agreements about resolution of future differences after the divorce is over

Focuses not only on resolving past differences but also on planning for healthy responses to current challenges and on laying a strong foundation for the future after the divorce is over

Aims toward deep resolution, not shallow peace

Why You Do Not Want an “Old-Style Divorce”

We’re confident that, like the people we work with every day, you want to protect yourself and your loved ones from the havoc that an old-style divorce can wreak in your lives. Let’s summarize the facts you now know about old-style divorce:

It is based on the centuries-old belief that divorce is wrong and abnormal

It seeks to find fault and mete out punishment

It focuses on the past

It is premised on conflict

It is constrained by an arbitrary legal framework intended to resolve matters of right and wrong by the exchange of money

It aims at a deal, not deep resolution

It fails to take into account current understandings of how people are wired, what they need in times of change, what children need during and after divorce, and how families change and restructure

What’s more, we know that old-style divorce is bad for individuals, families, and communities because

It’s expensive

It’s hurtful and damaging

It’s “one size fits all”

It deems irrelevant many common concerns that are extremely important to most people because judges can’t issue enforceable orders about them

It focuses on the past

It encourages unrealistic expectations on the part of both spouses about what should happen in the divorce

It resolves disputes through competing predictions of what a judge would do rather than focusing on what you and your partner can agree on

It won’t provide essential help to you or those you care about

The emotional and social costs are incalculable

Luckily, we live in an era when there is finally a better option — one that can end a marriage without destroying a family or setting into motion negative effects that can bedevil family members for a lifetime.

Why Collaborative Divorce Works So Well

The reasons why collaborative divorce does such a good job of helping most people achieve their own “best divorce” are simple. Collaborative divorce addresses the financial and legal matters that must be resolved in any divorce, but it does so more effectively because it provides the built-in help of three professions, not just one. The design of collaborative divorce — with its team of professionals, its systematic attention to values, its emphasis on healthy relationships, and its focus on the future — takes into account the broad spectrum of what really matters to most people when their marriages end. It considers not only the two spouses but those around them who also matter to the divorcing couple and who will be both directly and indirectly affected by a good or a bad divorce: children, families, and even extended families, friends, and colleagues. It applies what we know about marriage and divorce from the realms of psychology, sociology, history, law, communication theory, conflict resolution theory, finance, and other realms in a very practical, useful, and concrete way.

Collaborative Divorce Deals With What People Actually Experience in Divorce

Unlike any other divorce conflict resolution process that has come before, collaborative divorce teams make constant use of vital information about how people are “wired,” how we think, how our emotions affect our ability to communicate effectively and to process information, how we experience pain and loss, how we recover from the end of a marriage, what our children are experiencing and what they need in the divorce, and what the needs of each member of the family after the divorce are likely to be. In this way, collaborative divorce offers constructive, comprehensive, multidisciplinary professional support that responds to the actual complexities of divorce as people experience it, rather than imposing an old-fashioned, limited institutional legal point of view as the sole perspective on a complex human experience.

Reprinted from Collaborative Divorce: The Revolutionary New Way to Restructure Your Family, Resolve Legal Issues, and Move on with Your Life by Pauline H. Tesler, M.A., J.D., & Peggy Thompson, Ph.D. Copyright © 2006 Pauline H. Tesler & Peggy Thompson. Published by Regan Books; June 2006;$25.95US/$33.50CAN; 0-06-088943-8

No couple enters into marriage thinking that they’ll be the ones who won’t make it. It is also hard to imagine a more difficult transition for a child. Divorce leaves behind devastating effects on a person and his/her family and getting a divorce involves many procedures and expenses. In such case, the guidance of an experienced lawyer can reduce your emotional pain and help you to procure all your compensations.

Seek help from North Carolina Divorce Lawyers

Divorce is a complicated process that involves many vital issues including custody of the child, equal distribution of marital assets, child support payments, child visitation rights and so on. It is always advisable to seek the help of a lawyer that keeps your interests at the forefront and successfully secures all of your legal rights. North Carolina divorce lawyers from Robertson, Medlin & Blocker PLLC will provide genuine assistance to all of their clients. North Carolina divorce lawyers have many years of experience with divorce as well as collaborative divorce.

Benefits of Collaborative divorce

A collaborative divorce can provide innumerable benefits including the following:

The process of a collaborative divorce is much faster and the divorce attorney’s fee is lesser than litigation fee. A collaborative divorce prevents the application of foul tactics, hence resolving the disputes entirely in your interest. A collaborative divorce is completely interest based and gives utmost importance to your interests. A collaborative divorce focuses on what works best for both the parties.

Expertise of North Carolina Divorce Lawyers

North Carolina divorce lawyers offer their best efforts to provide you an amicable divorce, safeguarding all your interests. They are experts in this field and possess many years of experience in their kitty. North Carolina divorce lawyers can help you to peacefully resolve your divorce and gain the custody of your child. They can provide resolution to many issues relating to modification of custody, paternity, child visitation, child support and many more. In addition, you can also seek North Carolina divorce lawyers’ help in resolving legal issues such as personal injury, business litigation, employment law, family law and wrongful death.

Robertson, Medlin & Blocker PLLC pride themselves on listening to each clients’ concerns and solving all their issues peacefully. They possess a team of expert North Carolina Lawyers who provide perfect guidance to each client and help them secure their compensations.

Does every divorce or child custody case have to end in a bitter trial? While in days gone by, Fort Worth Divorce Lawyers devoted the majority of their time to preparing clients for that day of reckoning at the courthouse, times have changed. Although popular media still glorifies the drama of such trials, family law lawyers in Dallas and Fort Worth have embraced collaborative law as a smart alternative to trial.

Divorce trials put people in an adversarial framework where the only means of achieving success is at the expense of their spouse. Unfortunately, Attorneys learned that such “winner take all” conflicts at the courthouse did not lay the foundation for effective co-parenting post-divorce. Ultimately, it is the children of these divorces who pay the ultimate price when they are caught in the middle of parental conflict and bitterness caused by a bitter divorce.

What makes the collaborative divorce different? In a collaborative divorce, divorcing couples sign a Collaborative Law participation agreement that requires they do not seek any relief from a court while participating in the process. How do things get resolved without family court and a Judge? Issues are resolved through a series of four-way meetings, face to face, between the spouses and their collaborative attorneys.

Collaborative divorce requires a full and complete disclosure of marital property and debts and a meaningful exchange of ideas between the parties focus on their needs rather than seeking an advantage over the other spouse. While divorcing couples still have conflict and disagreements in collaborative divorce, the process gives them a “safe” way to systematically work on the issues without resort to personal attacks on the other spouse.

Collaborative law attorneys in Fort Worth and in Dallas are experiencing rapid growth in their practices as divorcing couples learn about the advantages of the collaborative process. Finally, divorce lawyers have found a way to be a part of the solution rather than a part of the problem.

But how do you get started with a collaborative divorce? First, you need to find a family attorney who is trained in the collaborative law process.

Next, you need to educate your spouse about the collaborative law process and it’s benefits for divorcing couples. At Schreier & Housewirth family law, we have helpful written materials you can give to your spouse that will clearly explain the process. Remember, both you and your spouse have to agree to use the collaborative divorce process rather than divorce by trial. Finally, your spouse will need to locate a lawyer. As members of the Collaborative Law Institute of Texas and the Tarrant County Collaborative Professionals, we can help your husband access our collaborative professionals network in the Dallas and Fort Worth area.

There are times when a divorce becomes inevitable for a married couple. Both husband and wife realize the futility of living in a threadbare and destructive relationship and want a way out. In such a situation it is important to find a lawyer who can guide their client through the crisis. Michigan individuals can benefit greatly from the knowledge and counsel of a qualified divorce lawyer. These professionals are in a position to help them take care of their divorce and other related matters such as child custody and division of property.

A divorcing couple has to settle several issues that affect not only them but also their offspring. There are innumerable issues that come up during court proceedings and have an impact on the children as well as other relatives of the couple. In this context, choosing the right Michigan divorce lawyers becomes much more important. Potential clients need to do the research necessary to find proficient practitioners of law.

A Michigan divorce lawyer should have the necessary experience in matrimonial or family law, and be able to work with other professionals such as real estate appraisers and accountants who are involved in the divorce process. This has an important bearing on the outcome of any case; the actual property being obtained by one party in a divorce often depends on his or her lawyer’s ability to understand the situation and negotiate effectively. A Michigan divorce attorney should typically have a lot of experience in fighting and winning cases for his or her clients, and have the skills required to resolve issues pertaining to parenting and child custody. The lawyer should also be able to obtain a reasonable and fair settlement for the client.

Some reputed Michigan divorce lawyers have made their services available online; interested individuals can easily contact them using the information provided on their websites. Some providers are especially proficient in collaborative law, divorce, break ups, and domestic partnerships. The divorcing couples can make the most of these high-end services and start a new life without having to go through undue legal stress. Many experienced Michigan lawyers have reasonable charges, thus enabling their clients to begin the new phase of their lives without excess financial strain.

To know more about Michigan divorce Attorney and Southfield divorce lawyers, visit www.lady4justice.com.